Angad Kaur

I still exist

Fri, 04 Jun 2004 00:09:41 GMT

Just a quick update to let every one know that I'm alive. I've been staying at my parents house, since I can't be left alone. I had a little accident last week, and now it has been decided that I need babysitters. Of course that's not what they call it, but it is what it feels like.SAnd I know that they are just trying to help, it just gets a little frustraiting when privacy and alone time aren't available to you anymore. Anyway, if you've been calling and I'm not there, you now know why. I love you all very very much, and I hope to be able to talk to you soon.

Off the wall

Wed, 19 May 2004 03:16:12 GMT

I first off have to apologize for how scatter brained this is going to be...

Right now, I'm sad, down, depressed.... you know the drill. Money is still as tight as ever. I know that I was freaking out about that whole job thing. Now I've Been talking to my mom, and it's like she finally is getting what I go thru on a day to day basis. Ok, maybe not even getting, but she's asking questions, and trying to understand. That means a lot to me.

My mom and dad are picking me up tomorrow to register for access... or whatever it's called... My driving abilities are very unpredictable, as is my attendance in life. So they decided picking me up would be the best option. There is more stuff about disability, but I'm not going into it for fear of being judged.

I've been a hermit lately. I'm so unpredictable, I don't even want to be around me. I can't answer questions, and I can't eat. It's too much for me. I can't even take a shower alone.

If this is too much for you, or you just don't feel like trying to understand it, I completely understand, and you should probably stop reading. :)

My house is a MESS and I hate it. I can't clean, once again I get overwhelmed. Steph says we are going to clean tonight, but I have a feeling that isn’t going to happen. It would be great if it did though. Whenever she comes home we normally don’t get around to things because we just want to cuddle. Or I switch, or something. The point is… there is always something.

Part of me wants friends, but it’s like the other part doesn’t want to put people thru what they would go thru if they became close to me. And I’m not trying to sound like some sob story here… I’m just saying how I feel.

I’m taking this birth control crème now… not for what you think. But it’s to regulate my cycle. It’s all natural, and I like that. It’s actually made out of yams. Compared to what normal pills are made out of (horse urine). Now doesn’t that make yams sound a whole lot better.

I’m actually quite proud of myself for being able to type this much. I’m actually typing it in Microsoft word because it seems every time I try to write in the little update page, something goes wrong and it gets deleted.

For those of you who read, thank you. And I hope this helps to explain some things. If I’ve just confused you I’m sorry. Be assured that I do my best in all that I do. And know that I love you all very much.

1st day alone

Wed, 21 Apr 2004 16:26:56 GMT

Yesterday, I was thinking about staying home... in fact I was postive I was going to. Then I started crashing, and I knew I had to get out. So I drove to Josh's. Monica came over at about 4, Josh came home about 5. And we went shoe shopping. I wanted to buy out the store, but with Monica and Josh reminding me I just have to wait two more weeks, and funds will be better... I made it thru. Well, with the exception of a pair if carebear flip flops. ^^ They were only 5 bucks, and how could I resist.
After that we went to sweet tomatoes, that was yummy! Monica asked me a little bit about why she wasn't feeling rested, and I gave her a few possibilities. It was nice being able to reach in my knowledge to come up with a couple ideas as to why. Not many people ask me about it, and I felt helpful. ^^
Today, I'm, going to clean and paint. That's the plan anyway. I'm also going to try and fit a nap in there. Oh, and watch bend it like beckham. Ok... well I'm going to go and find something to do. Toodles.

Josh's Sharell (sp?)

Tue, 20 Apr 2004 15:42:18 GMT

I've been over at Josh's alot. He's such a sweetie for letting me stay there so much. But I don't really have access to contact people. And I can't reas IM's, email, or LJ. So if you need to talk to me, your best bet is to call Josh's house. Anyway.... I don't have a whole lot to say... So I'm gunna get going.

I just wanted to say....

Sun, 11 Apr 2004 10:03:54 GMT

Happy Easter Everyone!!!!

Another day goes by....

Thu, 08 Apr 2004 16:11:12 GMT

Well... let me see...

Right now I have a massive headache, so that sucks. But I refuse to stay in bed any longer. I kept having bad dreams... so I figured it was time to get up.

Steph got my busniess web page up, so I'm extremely happy about that. I'd tell you all but I'm scared, seeing as how you are all major computer people, and could probably pull something better out of your nose..... but I'll give it to you anyway, just so you can see my paintings.
www.adlibs.biz

Busniess is picking up, that's a good thing. I think the mural we did at Debbie and Heidi's was really good for busniess. Debbie's given out tons of cards, I hope we get some calls on those soon.

Steph and I are getting together with Lance tomorrow night just to watch movies. That'll be intersting to see, I'm guessing it's going to turn into something else too. And I have no idea what movies we are going to watch. But we'll figure something out.

We are meeting with Micheal on Monday at 4. He seems like a nice guy, I'm just a little hesitant about him because he seems a bit superfishil. But I'm not going to judge him, especially before I meet him. Steph really seems to like him... so I'll give him a chance.

We are going to meet up with Shaun really soon, we just aren't sure when yet. He's just getting situated in his new home, and he said I can paint anything anywhere. So I'm excited. So many giant canvases. And he doesn't live far away, that's a plus.

Steph does orientation for her job at the post office on the 17th. After that I'm going to be alone all the time. The only time I won't be is when I'm sleeping. She'll be gone monday thru saturday 6am till 9:30pm. That's alot of alone time, and I don't like it. So if anyone, andI mean anyone wants to volonteer some "Jamie needs company" time. That would be really cool. :)

Well... I'm going to go someplace dark and try to rid myself of this headache.

Seriously... try this..

Fri, 02 Apr 2004 16:20:06 GMT

Check this very soon, before someone forces Google to
fix its site:
1) Go to www.Google.com

2) Type in weapons of mass destruction (DON'T hit return)

3) Hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button (Auf gut Glück), NOT the "Google
search"

4) Read the "error message" carefully. The WHOLE page. Someone at
Google
really has a sense of humour. And will probably be fired soon!!!!

Make sure you read the page, even though at first glance it looks like a regular "page cannot be found" page.

Happy St. Patricks Day!!!!

Wed, 17 Mar 2004 13:04:55 GMT

Kiss me I'm Irish!!!
no... really... I am... ;)

The meeting....

Tue, 16 Mar 2004 05:14:22 GMT

So... we met with Lance... and oh my god is he a sweetie... He's just like Steph... only about 6'2 and has a penis. But he's such a cuddle bug. And I really think steph and I've made a new, and very good friend. He made it clear that he won't make any moves toward me, unless I make them first... so that's reassuring. We only got to spend about 1 and a half hours together... but it was enough to just start to get to know eachother.

I just watched the L word... Steph and I are so into it... watching it from day one... and I cried... Bette and Tina just lost their baby... oh my god...

Steph's working on filling out more paperwork for the post office... She has to go back ten years in her employment history... and give exact times locations (with 9 digit zip codes) and what her salary was. I can't believe they need it that detailed. So, I'm going to stay up with her as long as it takes... the paperwork has to be done by tomorrow morning... so it might be a late night. I hope everybody is doing well... Love you all!

test...yay.. :)

Sat, 13 Mar 2004 15:44:17 GMT

You are blessed with FAERY wings. Beauty,
laughter, life, magic...that's what you are all
about. You are refreshingly innocent and happy
with your life of purity and play. Life's a
game and it's a good one. In your eyes there's
no way to lose! You can be very mischeivous and
have been known to cause trouble, but it's all
in the name of fun and not meant to really harm
anyone. You like to play tricks on people who
aren't quite as bright or clever as you - which
is almost everyone. Nature is the setting you
prefer to be in - Always. Barefoot and wild you
can't be tamed. You're probably a restless
spirit who loves to travel, and quite a
dreamer. Your creativity is astounding and your
art (of whatever media - from writing to
painting to drama) is like something from
another world - ethereal and often very
fantasy-oriented. You can either be a social
butterfly or a loner with their head in the
clouds - but rarely inbetween. You stubbornly
refuse to accept responsibility or to give in
to the wishes of others - unless you feel like
it. You have a strong passion for music and
can't imagine life without it. You'll grow up
someday, but you'll always be a child at heart.
You are adventurous and love to take risks, and
feel a deep connection with the weather,
plants, and animals. You prefer sunshine to
thunder or snow, the warmth of summer to
autumn's chill, and quiet forests to suburban
backyards. Magic through and through, you are
far more powerful than you seem, and are
capable of being extremely passionate. Though
you can be childish, naive, stubborn, and self-
absorbed, one thing is certain - life with you
will never be boring!

*~*~*Claim Your Wings - Pics and Long Answers*~*~*
brought to you by Quizilla

By the way, I had an awesome time last night :) I was sad I didn't get to see Nichole, but I know I'll see her someday. :) I had so much fun... I forgot how good that felt. :)

Not a whole lot to say...

Sun, 07 Mar 2004 18:41:48 GMT

Well, as for right nowe I just got some watching Highlander. It was alright... I think I'm just not feeling well in general. I went over to my parents yesterday... same old, same old. Very intense back pain... I'll be so happy when this goes away. Money is tighter than ever. We havent bought groveries in like three weeks. My mom was nice enough to send us home with food. She's always been like that. I think it's sweet. Summers starting to roll around.. and I'm getting burned my the sun every time I go out now, so that's annoying. This past week I'v ebeen to three different types of doctors... I'm hoping this will help the mental/emotional stuff I'm going through.

I've been dealing with poor self esteem... that just keeps getting worse... then I've realized... the only reason I have that problem... is because I care about what people think of me. Even my friends... If I were to just be myself... and people chose not to be around me, then I guess they weren't my friends anyway. But maybe I'm just scared that I wouldn't make new ones... Then again maybe I'm just rambling because I'm not feeling well. :)

Anyway, steph has a second interview with the postoffice, and an interview with the city of mesa next week... so things are looking up. I hope everyone is happy, and doing well. I love you all.

Mon, 23 Feb 2004 17:00:56 GMT

Today, is a nice wonderful, rainy day. I love it. :)

I'm feeling down today... despite the gorgeous weather. Let me explain, as best I can...

Steph tested for the post office (good)
Three hundred people also showed up to test (bad)
They are going to hire about two hundred (good)
Steph got a letter from the City of Mesa saying they want her to come in and interview for a security job (good)
Both jobs pay good (good)
Right now we can't afford any extras (bad)
We can't afford the grocerys we need (bad)
I can't get a job for extremely personal reasons (bad)
I couldn't get a job until after we found out where Steph is working anyway because we will be moving. (bad)
I have a doctors appointmest tomorrow (good/bad)
I'm not sure if I can afford it. (bad)
Extremely low self esteem (bad)

I'm having trouble being my normal perky self... things keep getting harder and harder to smile through. I wanted soooo badly to go to the highland games... but I just can't afford it. I know it's only $12, but for me it might as well be $1200. I can't go out, my car has about a half tank of gas, and to go see my friends, it would eat up all my gas, and I can't get more right now... Steph needs it so she can get to work. She should have a new job by the end of March. But I can't afford birthday presents. I'm so ashamed. I still have my murals, which I would normally make good money on.. but my mother keeps giving jobs away. I'm just feeling pretty much utterly alone, and hopeless. I want that to change. Thanks for being my venting board. Love you!!

C is for Cookie. ;)

Sat, 21 Feb 2004 14:19:21 GMT

I'm up, all to early for a saturday morning, because Steph is off testing for the post office. And when she came in to kiss me goodbye, it spooked me a little. I think I was having a bad dream or something. But, wish her luck... we could really use her getting this job. The pay is good, and it offers benefits and overtime.

I've been worried about Sunny Bunny lately. She's just laying around... and sometimes she starts breathing funny. If I could afford it, I'd take her to a vet... but right now, I'm just sending her Reiki, and giving her lots of love.

Last night I got some film for my camera, I'm so happy. I love taking pictures. I swear, any form of art I can get my hands on, I'm all over. ;)

Still feeling kinda lonely, don't know anyone out here. Mostly little hispanic kids, and I don't speak spanish. Not to mention, we are looking at moving as soon as we can. But, I'd still love to have more companionship, ya know?

Well, I'm going to find something to do. I hope everyone is having a good day. Love you!! :)

Sat, 14 Feb 2004 15:55:11 GMT

I just wanted to wish you all a Happy Valentines Day!!! Because I love you all.

Angry....

Sun, 01 Feb 2004 00:35:00 GMT

I just went for a walk... Well, Steph and I did. It was a long one too. But while we were out I ran into My Aunt Marie... at least that's what I'm supposted to call her.. she is about 32, but acts like a ten year old. She zoomed past us in a new 2002 camero... then stopped and turned around... sped up until she was right next to sheph and I then slammed on the breaks. Got out and asked me why I never answered my phone, I told her that she had never called... Anyway.. I'm too pissed to explain the whole thing so I'll do it the short way.

My "Aunt" is the biggest fucking screw up I've ever met. It wouldn't bother me so much except that she has two beautiful kids that she should be taking care of. The car, that she and her boydriend at the time were driving when they came across us, was stolen... they had stolen it the night before. (Marie tried to tell me to get into the car, I said no, I'm proud) I called my mom, and told her that I saw Marie, and that she had dropped a tremendous amount of weight, and looked quite stoned... Got off the phone, and my mom called my grandma... My mom called me back and told me, that the car they were driving was stolen.. which I already knew, but what I didn't know, is that she (my aunt) had abandoned her children the previous night and my grandma got a call saying someone needed to come pick them up.

Those kids don't deserve this... they have gone through this so many times... but I don't think they have ever been abandoned like that before. My grandma, who just graduated from college a full doctor of naturapathy, and JUST finished her boards the night before all this... now has a 8 and 3 year old to raise... the kids have no other family.. and Both my grandparents work... my Aunt Patty is a single mom of three who cant support another two... and My parents don't have what it takes right now either. So... that leaves me... I called my grandma and told her that I'll take care of the kids anytime she cant... she was appreciative, and on the verge of tears, which is a HUGE thing for her... miss heart of ice... and well.. everything is a mess... I just ask you... please.. pray for these children.. They deserve better than moving from place to place, living on the streets, with a mom who sells herself for drugs... they deserve .. well.. happiness. Thank you, and I love you all.

Ho Hum

Fri, 30 Jan 2004 16:04:36 GMT

Well, Steph and I have been applying for tons of jobs... She got a call back on Wednesday, went for the interview on thursday, and I think she's going to get it. So lets pray. ;)

Finally got promise on tuesday, her and Sunny do not get along. Promise ripped out silver dollar chunks of Sunny's fur, and Sunny had a pretty deep bite mark on her back. The only thing on Promise, was blood on her lips. OK, I know that this makes promise look evil... but she really is a nice rabbit. She was just spayed last Friday, so I'm sure she's a little sore, and I know I get cranky when I hurt. But she's had a rough life, and she's not even one yet. Right now, she loves people, but not other animals... I think that'll change once her hormones settle and balance.

On a sad note... Candi passes away last week. :( I knew she wasn't all that healthy, her breathing was very fast, and her coat wasn't shiny or as soft as it should be. But I thought she was going to get better. But I found her gone, laying on her side, as Sunny was licking her face... Sunny was, and still is quite depressed. They got to be the best of friends... they were inseparable. But she is in a very happy place now. And I'm sure someday I'll see her again.

I've been working on my mural business lately, Steph's going to make a website for it. Bless her heart... I'm so glad that she has computer smarts. Definitely not my strong point.

I've been cooking. :) I finally got over my fear of the stove... It was strange, I don't know how when or why I developed it, but it's gone now, and I'm really finding joy in it. I've also been baking alot more. Yesterday evening, I made chocolate cake brownies, with chocolate chips, and reeces pieces, and chocolate cream cheese frosting. I sent them in to work with Steph. Apparently everyine there seems to enjoy my baking. I sent in cookies with her last time and they were gone with in a couple of hours. And I sent in about 4 and a half dozen. Ok.. well I'm going to head off and do my daily stuff. Love you all!!

Had to take this quiz. :)

You are blessed with FAERY wings. Beauty,
laughter, life, magic...that's what you are all
about. You are refreshingly innocent and happy
with your life of purity and play. Life's a
game and it's a good one. In your eyes there's
no way to lose! You can be very mischeivous and
have been known to cause trouble, but it's all
in the name of fun and not meant to really harm
anyone. You like to play tricks on people who
aren't quite as bright or clever as you - which
is almost everyone. Nature is the setting you
prefer to be in - Always. Barefoot and wild you
can't be tamed. You're probably a restless
spirit who loves to travel, and quite a
dreamer. Your creativity is astounding and your
art (of whatever media - from writing to
painting to drama) is like something from
another world - ethereal and often very
fantasy-oriented. You can either be a social
butterfly or a loner with their head in the
clouds - but rarely inbetween. You stubbornly
refuse to accept responsibility or to give in
to the wishes of others - unless you feel like
it. You have a strong passion for music and
can't imagine life without it. You'll grow up
someday, but you'll always be a child at heart.
You are adventurous and love to take risks, and
feel a deep connection with the weather,
plants, and animals. You prefer sunshine to
thunder or snow, the warmth of summer to
autumn's chill, and quiet forests to suburban
backyards. Magic through and through, you are
far more powerful than you seem, and are
capable of being extremely passionate. Though
you can be childish, naive, stubborn, and
self-absorbed, one thing is certain - life with
you will never be boring!

*~*~*Claim Your Wings - Pics and Long Answers*~*~*
brought to you by Quizilla

Tue, 13 Jan 2004 20:23:44 GMT

I'm going to the chiropractor today.. and I'm so glad. I'll be getting accupuncture too... as usual. I'm not sure whether I want to get physical or emotional points done. Last time I got the emotional points.. and it was pretty painful. I'll probably be doing a mural for my chiropractor, she want's an oriental garden painted on her back wall. Debbie (my chiropractor) and Heidi(her girlfriend) have a house together, a really nice one too. They have decorated it beautifully, and their pool in the back yard, has little sea turtles painted on the bottom. I love it. :)

I'm hoping that Steph and I can spend some intimate time together tonight. we really haven't been close in a while. Something always comes up, or one of us isn't feeling well... you know the drill. It's probably mostly my fault lately. I just haven't had the drive. For instance, she'll hint at something, and we'll kiss, and we'll hold eachother... but I just can get in the mindset. I used to not even have to worry about it. I'll tell her I'm not in the mood. She doesn't understand, but she respects my decisions. I don't want her to think that it's her... because it's not at all. But other than that I don't know what it is. Sometimes... I just like random act of affection. And it seems like now, we have to discuss everything, or make time for it.. then it's just not fun anymore.

I talked to my mom today, she says that I have to start paying for all of my insurance, and my phone. Which I think is perfectly fair, I just wish I was making the money to cover it. Oh well, I'm sure something will work out.

Sunny and Candi seem to be getting along better. At first Sunny was really protective of her cage, but I think she's learning to share. They are fine when they are running around, but I have to put them in at night. I found that out the hard way... I left them out a couple of nights ago, and I found little presents all over the floor when I got up. Not to mention a couple little stains on the couch. Wasn't to happy about that. But I love them so much, it's fun to watch them hop around and see their little bunny aerial acrobatics. :)

Because I wanted to be like Zach. ;)

Tue, 13 Jan 2004 00:18:10 GMT

Feeling lonely...

Mon, 12 Jan 2004 19:54:23 GMT

Steph's at work... I'm still recovering from a cold I caught while attempting to spend the night at Josh's house. I'm realizing more and more how I've trapped myself. I love my life with Steph, I just need to have a life outside of home too. I start thinking that I can't do anything during the day... and I feel bound by the fact that things need to be done around the house. The truth is.. I just need to get out and do stupid things.... just for the purpose of having fun. Plus it might do me some good to be busy during the day... that seems to be when the most injuries take place. Except the last couple of days when they have been in the middle of the night. But, I don't want to talk about that now. I think I just need to hang out with my friends.. and get my old hyper/happy/random self back.

I had to call and make and eye appointment. My left eye, as some of you know.. doesn't work so well... and it's really starting to take a toll on my vision as a whole. And I've finally realized that I'm not going to wear glasses for a long period of time. So I'm going to try contacts. I'm going to get blue and green ones. That way I can wear one blue and one green.. I like how that looks.. I know I'm strange. But if people can wear white ones... I can do that. ;)

I got my corset.. I'm so happy. It really looks awesome. The only problem is that I can't drive with it on. So the only way I can show people is if someone else drives.

Went over to Josh's last Monday. I really enjoyed seeing and spending time with him. I got to see the third LOTR so I'm happy. I clung to him like duct tape most of the time. I feel so bad for golom (sp?). I liked it alot. ;)

I haven't seen my parents in about three weeks. I haven't talked to them but about three times.. which is strange because ever since I moved out, I had talked to them about every two days... just to say hi.. and get the latest on the rest of the family. I guess I just felt like my mom was trying to control me to much again. So naturally I distanced myself.

Steph and I have a new addition to our little family. I think I told you all about Aimee, the guinea pig. Well, now there is Candi, the bunny. She looks alot like Sunny Bunny, but he markings are placed a little differently. She was abandoned, and was going to be put down. So we adopted her. Then there is promise... she was abandoned.. and a dog bit off most of her left hind foot. She went to the animal doctor, and got fixed up.. she's still missing her foot.. but she gets around just fine. She's going to be fixed, then we are taking her home. We had to get her fixed because, Sunny and Candi are both fixed, and rabbits will pick on a female who isn't if they both are. Not only that but rabbits are extremely prone to ovarian cancer. Most un-altered rabbits will live about six to eight years. But Bunnies that have been altered live about 12 years. So you can see the difference. Well, I'm going to go let the bunnies run. I love you all.

Dream

Fri, 12 Dec 2003 15:44:17 GMT

I had a dream last night, and I can't figure this one out. I would really like anyone's input.

I was on a huge metal ship, put out to sea by an undercover government agency. I was being held captive, I had some sort of super strength and intelligence that even I didn't know about. The ship was run by women, of different shapes and sizes. I was taken to a secret room somewhere in the ships belly. I was stripped down and forced to bend over a metal pole, leaving me extremely vulnerable. Two women, one on each side of me were whipping me, while one in back of me was sticking things inside me. I had a feeling they were trying to get me to break, to get so mad that my "powers" would erupt. Finally I did, but it wasn't what they expected. I threw them down, and was running away in large leaps to the deck, I could feel them chasing after me. I finally got to the top, grabbed two small chains, that were attached to the ship at one end, and hooks on my end, and I dove into the water. I started swimming straight down, at the same time I put the hooks through my nipples, so my hands would be free... I swam to the bottom of the ocean pulling the huge ship under with me. My feet hit the ocean floor, and I started rolling and swirling, getting the ship to start creating a funnel. The water was sucked down, and I could finally see the sky, I had a feeling that I was going to escape, but things like this would be happening my whole life. Then I woke up.

Thu, 11 Dec 2003 22:46:43 GMT

I'm sittin' here waiting for Steph to get home, so we can go shopping. I'm listening to Meatloaf.... I love his music. The main reason for going to the store is becuase Aimee(guinea pig) and Sunny (bunny) need some lettuce and stuff. I was trying to figure out what to wear.. and I got frustraited... left my closet and raided Steph's. I stole her shirt and sweater vest... I think it looks pretty good, I know why bois dress the way they do now. :) I got her x-mas gift... she's the only one I could really afford something for... but that's ok, because personally I think that homemade gifts mean alot more. So I plan on makeing for all my friends. I can't believe christmas is so close.. is it just me or did this year fly by. Ok now I know I'm getting old because that's something that my parents would say... or my girlfriend (joking of course).

My grandma's graduating on Saturday, she invited Steph and I both.. which still just amazes me... because they all know that we are together. I think they just like steph, they know she treats me well. That and I'm that stage that if they didn't I wouldn't really give a flying fuck, ya know. It takes alot to put me there, but I think it's a good thing. So, anyway, we are going to her graduation at noon, then we are going to her house for a party. I'm not sure how much of the family is going to be there, but it couldn't be as bad as thanksgiving. Both sides of the family... realicing I'm a lesbian at the same time... woooo that was interesting. More the vibes people were giving off, no one actually confronted us.

Steph and I kiss in front of my parents all the time, and they seemed to have adjusted to it well... my mom more than my dad... which really just amazes me, I thought it was going to be the other way around. We go over there almost every weekend, and Steph's a good sport. I think she likes watching sports with my dad.. and they seem to be bonding... ahhh the son he never had... well sorta. :)

My mom and I are starting to get our busniess up and running. Yesterday I went over there and we must have gone through hundreds of photos just of previous murals. We found 12 count them 12 that we are actually considering for the flier we are going to make. It's hard because some of the painting's we thought would be good didn't work because the photos were of bad quality. My mom has a good quality digital camera now... so the photos come out better, but she hasn't hottn the primter figured out yet, so the colors are always off. She's has that thing for at least 9 months too...

You know what I just realized.. this saturday is Steph and I's 8 month anniversary... God it doesn't seem like it's been that long... it feels like it's either been longer, or shorter. We still haven't faught.. we pick on eachother sometimes.. I think we do it just to see the other get a bit flustered, but what couple doen't do that? We've delt with alot of shit so far, and I'm sure we are going to encounter much much more. I think that people seem to think that in a relationship you have to have everythign perfect... but I realize now... you dont.. you can spend so much time with someone, and see all there little quirks... and they will drive you insane, if you let them... I'm not even saying in a romantic relationship... just anyone. Then I remember I'm driving them insame too... and that makes me smile. :)

Question for all

Wed, 03 Dec 2003 19:54:11 GMT

Do any of you remember May Earl, I've been wanting to get in touch with her, and if anyone knows how to contact her, or knows someone who might know her. Please let me know. Thank you.

Mon, 01 Dec 2003 19:47:03 GMT

Bluemarine: Soft and subtle and definately
feminine. You are classy and cute with a
little girl all grown up appeal.

What fashion designer fits you
brought to you by Quizilla

MONEY!!!

Mon, 01 Dec 2003 19:41:18 GMT

I have discovered the beauty of online shopping. :)And let me tell you I have done some damage. :) I've bought 4 dresses, 4 shirts, 1 skirt, 3 pairs of pants, and one pair of shoes. God bless hot topic. Oh, and I bought a corset, but that was from versatile fashions. They are awesome, they make all their corsets custom. I got a gypsy corset, if you guys want to and have the time to check out the website, it's http://versatilefashions.com/

I'm so happy, I can't wait to get all my new stuff, oh and I got a pink suede cabby hat. ;) Can't forget that now can I?

Hey ho cool aid... or is it ade.... oh any way...

Sun, 23 Nov 2003 16:12:57 GMT

I just gave Steph the run down... apparently she didn't know how to post... just how to reply to other people. So now hopefully she can write something. :)

On another note... I have money!!! Yay!!! I can't tell you how happy this makes me. Money to pay the bills is a very good thing. I had to cash my savings bond... I'm sad about that, but I really didn't see any other option. It turned over at 3390 so I opened two new accounts... put one thousand in a personal account.. for clothes, hair stuff... you know personal items. I put one thousand and ninety in a savings account. I'm not going to touch that unless absolutely necessary. And I put twelve hundred in Steph and I's joint account for bills.. and groceries... you know that kinda stuff. So I finally have money for the clothes that I so desperately need.... But that means that I need someone to go shopping with... any volunteers? Finally got my sex life back on track... like you all needed to hear that I'm sure... but it really makes a difference in a relationship. There was a while when we were so stressed that it just didn't happen. But anyway off of that subject. :) I'm just sitting here drinking my morning coffee and playing on my computer... it's really awesome because Steph and I's normal routine to got on the computer and play until we wake up enough to face the day.... so she hooked up the computers so we can both be on the internet at the same time... and it's really funny because our computers are side by side. ok... well I guess I'm gunna get going... I love you all. Kisses!!